the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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