im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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