I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm like, not good at living.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
