i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
