Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
oh god was she eating orange peels again
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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