# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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