Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
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