he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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