I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
