HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
