a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
birth control should be required to get into college
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
