Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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