HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
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