I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
