Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I still have a little drunk in my system
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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