i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
