he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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