dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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