I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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