how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
