I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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