This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
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If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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