My first STD was from a foam party
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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