you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Your penis caused this!
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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