Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
