i just had sex bonerless
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
