I didn't shave. On purpose
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I am available for nakedness
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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