Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize