then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize