Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
