from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
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