Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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