nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize