I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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