You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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