Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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