i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
