I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
More tranny stories later!
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize