# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
People in love make me want to vomit
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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