Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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