Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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