You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
