a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize