i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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