I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize