my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Randomize
