Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (213): Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train. http://tfl.nu/ldtk
  Replies (39) Good night (720) Bad night (2307)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number... http://tfl.nu/xqo8
  Replies (22) Good night (3148) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (559): Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs http://tfl.nu/r642
  Replies (18) Good night (2727) Bad night (624)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  the ice cream truck is coming omgomg

  (1-650): View more from California

  dude, it's 2 am.

  (650): View more from California

  but its COMING

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): the ice cream truck is coming omgomg (1-650): dude, it's 2 am. (650): but its COMING http://tfl.nu/8z5r
  Replies (63) Good night (8466) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (226): View more from Ontario

  I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (226): I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop. http://tfl.nu/0sxf
  Replies (4) Good night (3584) Bad night (1205)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona.. http://tfl.nu/wgkj
  Replies (5) Good night (2910) Bad night (1544)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken. http://tfl.nu/s1v7
  Replies (10) Good night (1111) Bad night (2880)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar? http://tfl.nu/e57l
  Replies (9) Good night (1371) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem http://tfl.nu/va1i
  Replies (10) Good night (1690) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook http://tfl.nu/cps5
  Replies (5) Good night (1687) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney. http://tfl.nu/myp2
  Replies (22) Good night (2193) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum. http://tfl.nu/7kvh
  Replies (1) Good night (373) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain. http://tfl.nu/lmb6
  Replies (1) Good night (460) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning. http://tfl.nu/rhmo
  Replies (1) Good night (600) Bad night (235)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears. http://tfl.nu/ml9w
  Replies (0) Good night (284) Bad night (130)

Randomize