would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize