Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I queefed so loud it echoed.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize