She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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